Numb

Today is the day before Ben's Memorial service.  I think I am completely numb with the fact he is really gone.  Today at day program we had our traditional egg hunt.  It was really hard watching the clients collect those plastic eggs with candy. For the fact that Ben would get them as fast as he could to open them up to eat the candy inside. I would have to say that I am kinda of jealous that Ben is celebrating Easter with our King of Kings.  He is having the best Easter anyone could ever imagine!!

I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I do know that we are going to celebrate my brothers life the way he would like it. I feel honored to have been his sister for 26 years.  I know that I have taught him a few things, but I think Ben taught me more.   I loved him so much!! I am really going to miss that big smile of his that I got every morning on the way to day program, I am really going to miss those dirty looks he would give me when he was irritated with me. Games of patty cake, high fives, even the pinches and poking. I would have to say that Ben was an AWESOME brother!! I Love you Ben!!! Please give grandpa a hug for me as you two celebrate this Easter season with the King of Kings and Lord of Lords!!